Budgeting Tips

This was actually taken the day we moved to Missouri.
Since our car had no working heater, we purchased a few
Hot Hands and kept them in our hands and shoes the
whole ride. NOT fun.

My mother was the one who created our budget. At the time, the hubby and I had only been married a couple months. He was working a minimum-wage job and officiating, and I had been searching (unsuccessfully) for work in the area. We were "flying by the seat of our pants" as far as money goes. Don't get me wrong, we weren't spending willy-nilly, but keeping a mental tab isn't exactly the best way to make sure you stay out of debt. And we weren't.

Thing is, I'm the kind of person who likes to see things written-out. Want to make sure something gets done? Make me a list. Shopping trip? Make a list. Have a favor to ask? You'd better write it down, or I may unwittingly forget. So, while my mother was plugging in our bills and I saw our money draining down into oblivion and beyond, I went with it for a while. To this day, if you ask my mother about that experience, she will tell you she almost regretted putting together a budget for us because of what it did to me. As our money continued to burn into dust before my eyes and gaping holes begging for more money emerged, I tuned out altogether - not without a river of tears - and ended up having to go to sleep for a while and let the shock wear off.

She's there in the background - our '91 Honda.
(I don't know why I grabbed my brother-in-law's arm. I got in trouble for that - haa.
I'm also wearing my other BIL's hat.)

This may come as a surprise to you, but minimum wage isn't exactly great for supporting someone - not even a couple living in a TINY one-bedroom duplex. We did not live extravagantly. We slept on a second-hand mattress and box spring which sat on the floor, used second-hand furniture, and second-hand appliances (with the exception of our wedding gifts.) Our bathroom was so small we either had to sit on the toilet sideways or spread-eagle, and forget having two people in there at once. Our microwave sat on a thin fold-out table we received as a wedding gift (one of the best, by the way) because we had about 4 square feet of kitchen space, and couldn't fit the microwave on there if we hoped to be able to prepare anything at all. Oh, and don't get me started on our car - $600 off of craigslist, no air conditioning, questionable integrity.... 

That's not even mentioning the debt my darling sweetheart had gotten himself into before I knew him. Ugh.

We were happy in our modest surroundings, but didn't have enough money to keep them. Thankfully, we were alerted to a job opportunity in Missouri, and we soon moved down to take advantage of it with the help of my wonderful family. We ended up living with my mother for a few months, but that enabled us to buy a used car at a wonderful dealership (they do their own financing - email me for info!) after our car bit the dust. 

Since then, I have maintained and expanded our budget to fit our changing needs. Although our first introduction sent me into a coma, I am so very grateful to have it. I knew we weren't doing too well, I just didn't know how poorly we were doing. Having a budget sparked a desire for bigger, necessary changes, and has allowed an element of peace now that our bank account isn't gasping for air.

With that in mind, I wanted to offer a few budgeting tips I've come across, in the hopes that our experience can convince someone else to begin budgeting as well.

Found here.

1) Just do it. Budgeting may seem intimidating at first, but, once you get the hang of it, it's a piece of cake and can drastically improve your spending habits. There's no set way that you have to set up your budget. However, I am partial to using a spreadsheet where you use formulas to automatically calculate totals and subtract pending bills. Below are a couple of websites to help you along the way:

This website offers a few simple bullet points to help you determine what should be a part of your budget.

 website offers some great tips on how to improve your budget, and a couple of potential goals you might want to strive for once you're up and running. 

This link not only offers a ton of great advice for setting up your own budget, but they also have a couple links to pre-made Excel spreadsheets you can download to start your own budget! They also offer a few tips and goals in this link which you might want to aspire to once you're really up and running. From what I can see, that's a pretty neat website. I would recommend looking around a bit to see what gems you can glean. It looks like they even have free finance courses! Sweet!

Found here.

2) Don't be afraid to seek help. There are plenty of people willing to share their budgeting tips with you. If you have a friend or loved one who is particularly savvy about money, don't be afraid to ask them to share their personal tips. They might even be willing to help you overhaul your budget - a fresh pair of eyes is always beneficial.

Also, Pinterest is chocked full of budgeting tips. These include ways to save money while grocery shopping, better and more budget-friendly ways to make a certain meal, or even how to make your favorite furniture on the cheap. I challenge you to sign on, type "budget" into the search bar, and see what pops up. You'd be surprised. 

3) Keep accurate, updated records. Keeping an eye on your bank account and budget ensures they stay in-sync. It's a lot easier to deal with problems if you deal with them early-on. Additionally, it's a good idea to use a register. These typically come with your checks, or can be obtained at your bank. It's just a way to keep track of what you've spent, to whom, and when. 

For example, there are certain things I typically write checks for such as tithing. In our current ward, these typically come out of our account about a week after we hand them over. However, I've been in wards where several weeks go by without the check being withdrawn. It can be pretty upsetting to feel like you're on top of things when a lingering check suddenly comes out and messes with your plans. In my budget, I keep a couple separate rows for checks which have yet to clear, and they move over every week until they've cleared.

4) Be realistic in your planning. I know we're not the only family in the world who has to guess what we'll be getting in our check from week to week. Still, it just takes some attention to determine an average check and your typical spending habits.

With incoming money, it is a lot safer to plan for a smaller check than you think you'll be getting than it is to rely on money you may or may not end up with. Then when you do get a nicer check than expected, rejoice!... and save the excess. I'll get to that next.

With outgoing money (particularly bills which aren't a set amount each time) it's best to budget for a little bit extra unless you can be certain you will only spend a particular amount. 

You are doing yourself no favors if you estimate a higher income and lower expenditures unless they're actually going to happen. Try to keep to what you have budgeted, or you will have to re-adjust your figures.

5) Save, save, save. There's no such thing as "extra money" when you're on a budget - only opportunities to save. Even stray coins from cash purchases can add up quickly. Every time you put money you don't currently need away, you're ensuring money is there when you do need it, and those times will come - most often unbidden. Do you need to go to the movies every weekend? If you have extra money No. Watching a movie at home is often just as fun.

Found here.

That's not to say you should cut your social life down to nothing. Budget for it! If you don't have the money, don't spend it. If you have money but don't need to spend it, don't! Keep in mind that unexpected circumstances do arise, and you need to be ready for them. If you've spent all your money on frivolous desires, you won't be prepared when something truly important comes up.

I have often fallen prey to the idea that sales help me save money. However, this is untrue. First of all, if you don't have the money, you're not saving anything. Second of all, there's always something to save on. One week it's this, another week it's that. All those "savings" add up - and not in the way you want them to. Third, especially when it comes to groceries, don't buy more than you'll actually use before you can't use it anymore. I have learned not to buy more, say, sour cream than the hubby and I can use before it goes bad. Sure, the huge family size tub is "cheaper" ounce for ounce, but you're not saving any money if you're just going to have to rinse most of your purchase down the drain.

6) Don't give up. I didn't personally enjoy budgeting until I'd been doing it for a while (and let's be honest - having enough to meet our basic needs helped ease the pending insanity too.) Your budget can be your friend if you take care of it. If you mess up, don't throw the whole thing out. Just adjust your figures and move on. You'll get the hang of it.  

Found here.

Please realize that even people who budget carefully will make mistakes. That's life. You'll have expenses come up which you weren't anticipating, and they may set you back in your plans a bit. That's life. But you can move on from it, and your budget can help you with those plans.

The hubby and I don't have a lot of money, and most of the time things are very tight - but that doesn't mean we don't enjoy life. Our budget helps us know when we can afford to make necessary purchases, and helps us make important financial decisions. Start yours today, and I promise it will be a valuable tool in your financial arsenal.

Sincerely,

Lora.

Cats: The TRUTH (With Pictures!!)

I have a secret which will only really be a secret if you've never seen my Facebook page. I love cats. I'd rather spend the day with my cats than with children. Does that make me a terrible person? Maybe. For the record, this isn't me:

... although I did use eHarmony. (It didn't work. LDSPlanet did, though!!)

(Loyal followers might recall a similar post on another blog. Feel free to peruse that one too!)

I've had cats for as long as I can remember, wherever I lived. I believe the first cat in my life was named Dog (because that's how my family rolls), and it became clear that I was allergic to cats. I grew out of that allergy, fortunately, and have had cats whenever possible ever since then. (Other "clever" names have been Don Gato, Bob, The CUTE, and my Mom's cat is named "Cat.")

Years of experience have taught me one important thing: Cats can be your best friends if you treat them as such. Unfortunately, people tend to think cats are more like this:

In honor of my kitties reaching their first year of life, there are a couple myths I'd like to debunk with examples from my own babies. (You could also check out articles like this, and this.)

MYTH: All cats are the grumpy and difficult. I have had my current cats since they were only four weeks old (litter mates), and itty bitty. Even from that age, definite personalities emerge.

Penelope (or Pipps) has always been a loud-mouth who wanted to be close to me. She used to whine and whine until I would hold her close to me, where she would cuddle up and purr or sleep for hours.

Now, she remains the most vocal of my babies, even to the point that she greets me when I come home. This sweetheart also cuddles with me almost every night - sometimes right up against my face. She can be awfully stubborn, but she also makes me smile.

This is Killer, otherwise known as Bug. She has always been a sweetheart. When she was tiny, I noticed she doesn't meow like a regular cat. She chirps. She was always quieter and tends to be the shyest. She loved cuddles, and curling up on our bed to nap.

At a year old, she's still my little girl. She still cuddles with me, and still chirps like a happy bird. I enjoy how she is content to sit next to me and purr the day away. She was the most difficult to litter train (just as my mother and her soiled slacks) and tends to be the naughtiest now.

Panda is a little slow. We almost lost him after a bath one time after he started going into shock. For the first few months of his life, we weren't sure if he was capable of the slitty pupils typical of cats.

He is a mixture of needy and independent, and still very slow. He's the type of cat who would star in those videos where the cat tries to jump onto something but jumps short and falls on their face. And yes, he's a cutie and I love him.

MYTH: All cats hate water. Not so! In fact, I like to call Panda my shower buddy. Ever since he was big enough to climb up onto the edge of the tub, he has enjoyed sitting between my curtain and curtain liner while I shower, watching the water run down the plastic liner. Then, as soon as I shut off the water and push the curtain aside, he's in there playing in whatever water he can get his paws on. The same goes for Penelope and dripping faucets.

Of course, they don't enjoy being submerged in water, but all three of my fur-balls enjoy water in general. In fact, I'm considering getting a fountain for them to drink out of. It'll aerate the water and keep it moving, and I believe they'd enjoy it immensely (and I'd enjoy them not trying to drink out of the toilet.) 

MYTH: All cats prefer to be alone. This is not completely true. Cats are territorial. If you've ever had a cat and tried to introduce a "friend" you might have experienced some unexpected rivalry. Picture this from your cat's perspective, though: You're perfectly happy in your personal space, and your best friend - who is, of course, welcome in your personal space - decides to bring in some random other person. Not only is this person invading your space, but they've decided it's a good idea to spread their scent all over your things: your favorite toys, napping spots, even the window you like to gaze out of. What a nightmare! It's no wonder cats don't understand your intentions.

Because of this, you have three options:

1) Have only one cat. Although, who in their right mind can bear to have only one cat??

2) Introduce cats gently - Here's a link to Petfinder, where they talk about tips for introducing two cats. It is possible, it's just not always an easy process.

3) Pick litter mates or a couple of young babies to raise together - this way, they don't know any better than to accept the other cat as a normal part of their environment.

The truth is, cats are very social creatures. They enjoy company. I have a proverbial stack of pictures of my babies cuddling together in a heap. They groom and care for each other. They descend upon me, desperate for attention, when I arrive home after a day away. They are truly a part of our family. 

I thoroughly enjoy having cats. My sweeties are a year old now, and time has surely flown. We obtained my lovies, by the hubby's request, the day before we received our daughter's terminal diagnosis. We hadn't intended to have three cats, but they became a constant source of comfort and joy in a difficult time.

Cats can be grumpy, a lot of work, and impossibly stubborn, but, as long as you provide food, water, and a clean litter box, they will love you unconditionally. If you are able, I would definitely recommend inviting a cat or two into your life. Love them like the amazing creatures they are, and they will certainly bless your life!

Sincerely,

Lora.

Click here for a list of the "Top 10 Myths About Cat People" from Animal Planet, or here for a compilation of 50 adorable cats to improve your day!  

Oh, and this link is HILARIOUS. 

The pictures and videos in this post belong to their respective owners.

Stress/Time Management, Now with Bonus Tip!

A friend from high school, whom I will call Atlas, poses this question:

"What are some helpful stress and time management techniques for a person such as myself attempting to balance being a full-time college student, full-time employee, wife, friend and mommy to two cats and a puppy?"

First of all, Atlas, it's so sweet of you to assume I'd be good enough at stress and time management to be any kind of helpful. Ha! I kid, I kid. Often, I'm afraid, time and stress have an inverse relationship: a lack of time leads to more stress, and more stress leads to a lack of good time management. Then it's tougher-than-tough to claw your way out of either situation. What do you do?

*

Not that. Well, maybe that for a few minutes.

Whichever side you find yourself on, there is hope! Realizing this fact is the first step to climbing out of your stress/time nightmare. We all have our own particular stresses. My friends and readers know some of mine: trying to conceive, a rambunctious puppy, occasional familial stubbornness, money flow (or lack thereof), and the list goes on.

You, Atlas, seem to have quite a bit on your plate. However, that exact list of stresses has been handled before, and it will be again! Here's a couple tips just for you to help you tackle your particular list of stresses, and others which might come up.

1) It's okay to let things go every now and then. It's exhausting trying to be super mom/dad/friend/student/etc. Sometimes the best stress relief is simply only attending to what absolutely needs to be done, and that's it.

Does your puppy need to be out where he'll be getting into things and making you want to tear your hair out? No. In fact, some trainers suggest you kennel your puppy when you're not specifically paying attention to him. That way, he doesn't grow up thinking it's okay to run around chewing on things just because you're not always paying attention.

Do you have to stay up late doing things which may or may not really matter at the moment (such as watching a movie or listening to music?) No. Go to bed early. Even if you don't drift off right away, it's still relaxing to lay in bed and your body will definitely thank you in the morning.

2) Time can always be found. With seemingly-little time on your hands, looking at your day as "I need to do this, this, this,..." can be daunting. Take it a little at a time, and tackle small tasks whenever you have a window of opportunity - which might mean doing something while waiting to be able to finish something else. For example, tonight I threw dinner together (Bubble-Up Pizza - YUM), and, while it was baking, I tackled the dishes and tidied-up my kitchen. At the same time, Charles - ever the good husband - sat in the kitchen with me, talking about this or that, but sometimes simply listening to the music we had playing on my laptop.

Although I was getting a lot accomplished (cooking dinner, washing dishes, spending time with the hubby), I didn't feel overwhelmed because I wasn't trying to fit everything in separate time-slots. (Just make sure to set a timer or something if you're cooking, because it can be so easy to forget and burn your food!)

3) Multi-tasking isn't always best. During high school, I was in a car crash which left me with a concussion. Said concussion messed with my brain function at the time, and it hasn't been quite the same ever since. At the time, I had several large projects due, and seemingly no way to do them all. I had to learn that, although it's great to get a bunch of things done at the same time, multi-tasking isn't always the most efficient when you have important tasks to finish. I had to learn to focus on one project or paper at a time, or my work on all of them would be sub-standard. (I would like to point out that in my previous dishes and dinner scenario, I was technically only working on one thing at a time - I just wasn't waiting out the time for dinner to get done.)

At school, I found that, although I enjoyed listening to music while working, it often was more of a distraction than I had intended it to be. This is true for anything from music to videos, to Facebook (oh, I am so guilty of letting Facebook distract me! Please tell me I'm not the only one who instinctively goes there when getting on the computer.)

Some people are capable of doing multiple tasks successfully, but the truth is it's really better to focus all your attention on important tasks, especially if said tasks require serious brain-power.

4) Be consistent/Don't let things pile up. I dislike doing the dishes. It's not necessarily because it's hard, or it takes a lot of time - it's because I tend to let them pile up so when I do get around to them, they take f-o-r-e-v-e-r. The same goes for homework, other housework, even relationships. If you're consistently taking care of things while they're small, you won't have to worry about spending exorbitant amounts of time on one thing. Especially if you're still in the husband, wife, and no kids stage, dishes after dinner don't take very long, laundry doesn't pile up too terribly fast, and it doesn't take long to stop and say "hey, I love your face" every now and then.

Projects don't need to be finished all at once. Work on them a little at a time. If you have a research paper, instead of doing the research, writing, and editing it all the night before it's due (I know a lot of us are guilty of this), work on it when you have free time especially right after you receive the assignment. You will be a lot less stressed if you space out the work, and there's nothing better than getting to a deadline and knowing you've been finished for a week or two already. Plus, think of all the time you'll have free for other things!

5) Set aside specific special couple/rest time. From the beginning of our relationship, Charles has known how important it is to me that I get a significant amount of his attention (I'm needy - don't judge). Sometimes the best stress relief is just cuddling on the bed together (unless, of course, your partner is the cause of the stress.) Marriage is a wonderful institution where two people pledge to be there for each other through thick and thin. Don't let work, school, friends, or anything else weaken that relationship.

While at school, I found it particularly helpful to avoid any kind of work on Sundays. (I realize this is impossible for some people, but hear me out.) It was so wonderful getting to Sunday after a hectic week full of classes and social events to be able to have one day specifically for de-stressing. Since I was determined not to work on Sunday, it was basically a "rule" and I didn't feel obliged to attend to anything school-related. Sure, it meant I had to finish Monday's work Saturday night, but imagine the freedom of heading into a new week after having truly had a day to relax. No homework, no chores, just relaxation and peace. Even though I had cut down on my time available for doing work, I found the work still got done, and I was more relaxed throughout the week. Then I still had the next Sunday to look forward to. It was great!

I don't currently have any school obligations, but I still hold on to this rule. I have been doing my best to get at least a majority of the chores finished before Sunday rolls around. As any homemaker can tell you, it's great walking through your house and feeling like you don't have to do anything right away.

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I might end up adding more to this list as time passes, but I believe these are my current top five. I hope they help and please give your furry loves a squeeze for me!!

Readers: What are your favorite stress/time management tips and how have they helped you?

Sincerely,
Lora.

BONUS TIP: Write it down. Seriously - no matter what you're doing, write it down. I have tons of notebooks in which I write all kinds of things, from notes during church, to ideas during the day. Plus, my laptop has a handy "Notes" application which I use to record things I want to remember. Another thing about my concussion was it made things difficult to remember, and writing important things down helps a bunch.

When I was working, I had a notebook full of a bunch of notes from my supervisors. Of course, I kept them organized alphabetically based on topic, but that way I could keep track of everything I had been asked to do or keep in mind. (They loved that!) I also kept a pad of Post-It's nearby, in case I got sidetracked while in the middle of something. Once I finished whatever needed to be attended to, I had a note there to tell me where I was before!

Lists are great. It's a lot easier to accomplish everything you want to do if you know what it is you want to do! Additionally, it brings me great joy to cross something off of my list, even if it's a small task. (Speaking of which, don't be shy about writing small tasks down. They need to be completed too, and even if your list is comprised of small tasks, it still feels great to finish!)





*Picture from this site.

Come Listen to a Prophet's Voice

 

That pretty much sums it up. I promise you, even if you are not LDS, listening and/or watching General Conference with an open mind and heart will immensely bless your life. You will find answers to questions, discover peace in trials and find a joy you didn't realize you could have.

The men and women who will speak are lead by the head of the Church, our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. They have all the answers we need and are just all-around amazing people.

So give it a try! You can watch live from the comfort of your own home. You have nothing to lose! You won't regret it. Afterward, if you have questions, I would be THRILLED to address them.

Sincerely, Lora.